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Hillary Clinton: “I Wish Emails Were Never Invented”

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Sunday on CNN’s “State of the Union,” while commenting on Wikileaks releasing 20,000 emails that were stolen from the Democratic National Committee’s servers, presumptive Democratic presidential nominee Hillary Clinton’s campaign manager Robby Mook said the Russian government was involved with the leak to help the Republican nominee Donald Trump get elected.

The nominee herself, Hillary Clinton, spoke with Breitbart News a short time after Mook’s appearance on “State of the Union” and argued that “in this day and age because of modern technology, anything and everything is possible when one has plenty of resources and good motivation.”

“I don’t think there’s ever going to be an American citizen who’s going to believe that a Russian national, any Russian national is going to want to be friends with Americans, including President Vladimir Putin,” Clinton argued. “The kind of hatred, in lack of a better term, that exists between our two nations is natural, almost primordial. There’s no changing it and there’s no toning it down, which is why I completely believe what Rob said on ‘State of the Union.’ It’s not like they haven’t tried to meddle in our affairs before.”

Asked for her opinion on DNC’s leaked emails, Clinton recalled a number of other times where the word “email” was the root of her problems. “Believe me, regardless of how much I love being alive in this day and age, I just hate this modern technology,” she said. “Everything was better in the old days when the best we had were telephones, letters and personal conversations. I wish emails were never invented for more than one reason.”

Asked to elaborate, the Democratic presidential nominee argued that “this is not the first or likely the last time emails have cause her a headache.” “Firstly, there was that whole private email server shenanigan I was wrongfully accused of some time ago. Then, there was the unfortunate death of the U.S. ambassador in Benghazi, which again, someone thought would be a good idea to blame on me. Heck, even the Lewinsky incident would have been kept quiet if there hadn’t been compromising emails.”

“And now again, someone hacked into emails that, oh surprise, surprise – have to do with undermining Bernie Sanders, who, very oddly, seems to be running against poor, old Hillary Clinton. I mean, I’m all for coincidences, but this is getting ridiculous,” Clinton said. “In fact, I don’t think George Lucas or Steven Spielberg could have directed a movie that would have this juicy of a plot. But then again, Hollywood is a miracle. I wouldn’t be surprised to see a similarly-themed blockbuster in theaters as early as next year.”

“All jokes aside, \someone is obviously trying to set me up, and just like some stalkers have their preferred weapons of choice, mine has opted for modern technology in the form of emails,” Clinton opined. “I’m not sure what he plans to accomplish with them, but at the end of the day, my life would have indeed been much simpler and easier if there were no emails to being with.”